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Are You Afraid of Success?

Written on October 8, 2008 by George Krueger & Mary-Lynn Foster in Fear

afraid We won’t name names. However, we’ve all seen it – usually with a celebrity – a person who is on the verge of bigg success, but then they go through a meltdown.

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We wonder what could have caused it. Usually, it’s a very individual thing but there are some common reasons:

#1 – Self-doubt
You’re not sure that you can handle bigg success. You worry about what you don’t know. You dwell on what you don’t have (a common worry is not having the right degree). You tell yourself all the reasons why you don’t deserve this level of success, even though you’re so close to it.

#2 – Fear of loss
If you become more successful than your friends, what will they think? Will they still be your friends? Will they be jealous of your success? You know the answer to these questions already. What kind of friend wouldn’t be thrilled with your bigg success?

#3 – Fear of embarrassment
This fear is a carry-over from childhood – that adolescent fear of standing out from the group. You’re afraid of what people will think if they see you fail. Which leads us to …

#4 – Fear of failure
You may think that it’s better to have never experienced bigg success, than to have it and then lose it. Somehow it’s better to never get there. But why do you assume it will be fleeting?

The net result is that we talk ourselves out of succeeding bigg. We accept that it’s better to be part of the crowd than to blaze our own trail. We feel more comfortable. It seems less risky. But we’re wrong!

How to conquer your fear of bigg success

#1 – Self-talk is so important.

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marylynn As a first-time entrepreneur, fear has crept in on occasion. I’ve been lucky to have George around. He’s helped me understand that negative self-talk isn’t going to help you succeed. You have to turn it around.

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george Even as an experienced business owner, I still have to battle that little voice that impedes bigg success. You just have to constantly keep telling yourself why you will do it.

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Think of all the things you’ve done right to get this far. Remind yourself of the obstacles that you faced and how you overcame them. Focus on the things that have already gone your way.

#2 – You don’t have to get it perfect; you just have to keep going.
It certainly hasn’t been perfect up to this point, has it? So why would it have to be perfect from here on out? Enjoy the journey. Enjoy the growth you’re experiencing.

Every time we reach another plateau, we celebrate our victory. Then we look back and realize the victory had already occurred. We grew. We learned so much. That’s the real joy of bigg success!

#3 – Success comes one level at a time.
Sure you have to keep your eye on that ultimate goal. But you get there one step at a time. You only have to take the next step.

You’ve learned enough to know how to do that. Perhaps more importantly, you’ve already learned how to find out anything you don’t already know.

#4 – Surround yourself with people who have made it.
We can’t possibly over-emphasize this point. Develop a support network of mentors and coaches. People who were once where you are now, but are now where you want to be.

Don’t be afraid to take those little steps that lead to bigg success!

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Evidence shows that more and more of us are running two businesses simultaneously. Next time, we’ll get some tips from an expert who’s doing just that. Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

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Climbing The Stairway To Success

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How to Feel Rich Today

Written on March 19, 2008 by George Krueger & Mary-Lynn Foster in Balance, Happiness, Personal Growth, Success

rich_dessert Rich is a very rich word. It’s commonly defined as “wealth”, but “rich” has many meanings.

It means “quality” – “That’s a rich idea.”

It implies “fullness” – “I have a rich life."

Another meaning is “fruitful” – “He farms rich soil.”

Rich goes way beyond the common perception.

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Conditions vs. Expectations
If your current conditions equal or exceed your expectations, you’re happy. If you’re happy, you can feel rich.

If your conditions don’t meet your expectations, then you’re unhappy. In that case, you can either change your conditions or change your expectations.

3 ways to change your conditions

#1 – Change your attitude.
It all starts with you. If you think you can’t do something, you can’t. It’s that simple.

#2 – Change your self-talk.
Keep telling yourself that “you can do it”. Yes, we know about the Adam Sandler movies!

Say it over and over until you really, truly believe it. Every time you tell yourself something negative, you’re actually two steps behind. You’ve taken a step back because of this self-doubt, and you could have taken a step forward.

#3 – Emulate successful people.
You may not FEEL like doing something. Do it anyway. Fake it. Force it. Do what successful people do long enough and you’ll be successful.

3 ways to change your expectations

#1 – Stop trying to keep up with the Jones’.
It’s your life, not theirs. What difference does their opinion make? You’re the one who has to be proud of you.

#2 – Set goals that are achievable.
If you set the bar so high that all you do is work toward that goal, you won’t have a rich life. Set goals that stretch you, but don’t break you as you try to achieve them.

#3 – Look at what you have, not what you don’t have.
Savor your accomplishments before you move on. Look at your relationships and all the things for which you can be happy.

A man who changed his conditions
A friend of ours got in with a group at work that complained about everything – their conditions, their boss, and the company. They also never gave an ounce more than they needed to in order to keep their jobs.

One day, our friend got assigned to a project with a guy who was a bigg goal-getter. This guy only said good things about work, their boss, and the company. He did little things that made him stand out. Our friend emulated him. Before long, he got a promotion with a bigg raise.

A woman who changed her expectations
Sarah Susanka is an architect who has written ten books, including The Not-So-Big Life. She was a busy professional, but she was unhappy. She was so busy, though, that she couldn’t spare the time to figure out what to do about it.

After some time, she learned that she had breast cancer. While going through treatment, she didn’t have much energy, but she had time to think. She realized that quality, not quantity, is what matters. She says to focus on your comfort, not what impresses other people.