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Adam, have you ever thought about becoming a Wall Street investment banker, losing all your money and turning to the government for help?

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I have not.

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Maybe that would be an interesting experiment! Adam, there was a guy in the homeless shelter who said something to you that helped you get a job that paid well. Can you tell us about that?

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That’s my favorite part of this story. That was really the turning point for me in Charleston. I had been applying for jobs and two weeks in, nobody was hiring me. I was having spaghetti dinner at the homeless shelter one night and complaining about the economy. I mean, here I am – Adam Shepard, the king of the American Dream, “you can do it,” I’m proving the Dream – and I was complaining at a homeless shelter! The great thing about the shelter is that nobody is afraid to share their opinion; they’ll tell you what they really think. There was a guy – Phil Coleman – who piped in and said that I had to go out there and get the job. They weren’t going to call the shelter, which was the number I had put on the application. So I went to the moving company the next day, just like Phil Coleman had told me. I said, “Kurt, my name is Adam Shepard. I’m the greatest mover you’re going to find. So hire me or not. I’ll come in and work a day for free.” I just gave him this speech and he hired me on the spot. What’s interesting is that I took advice from a guy at the shelter who I wouldn’t have looked twice at in my “real life.” So that was a great humbling experience and it helped me turn the corner on this whole project.

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Something else – you waited for that guy at the moving company to show up. I think a lot of us expect that phone call. We think we’ve done our part. We went in and filled out the application. Now they need to call us. But Phil encouraged you to go and do whatever you had to so you could have a face-to-face meeting with the guy who would hire you.

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Exactly. And the moving company job was a job that I wanted. I was going to do anything possible until he sent me out the door with a definitive no. It’s a job that requires skill, of course, but it’s a skill you can learn if you’re willing to work. I wanted to meet the guys who were doing this work. It’s crazy – everybody’s moved their little apartment or home. But I wanted to meet these guys who were moving furniture eight to ten hours a day, six days a week, week after week after week.

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Or maybe even eighteen hours a day, at least once?

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Oh, yeah, the eighteen-and-half hour move. That was just crazy, an incredible experience – to start at nine in the morning and finish, literally, in the middle of the night. The great thing about that move, and I won’t get into detail about it now, was that every move after that was a piece of cake! Once you’ve done a move like that, you’re ready for anything. It was tough; it was a challenge for sure, but it prepared me for the next steps.

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Here’s something that intrigued me, Adam. You got a good job but you didn’t move out of the shelter right away. Man, I think I would have booked it. Why did you stay?

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There are two reasons I stayed at the shelter. First of all, I was able to save money and then when I first moved out, I was able to buy a truck and I could move up from there. But also, I was meeting guys who were so much more fascinating than me. I wanted to be able to tell their story and to really talk to them and see where they come from. That’s what this was all about for me. It wasn’t just to dip into a homeless shelter for a week or two. I really wanted to stay there for a little while. But you’re right – the moving company was a great job to have – because I was able to go out, work hard, make $9 an hour and get a tip now and then. I was able to save a lot of money for sure.

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We don’t want to tell anyone the ending, so we’ll stop here with the progression of the story. For anyone who has to go to a homeless shelter or wants to live vicariously through you, what are some tips for living in a homeless shelter?

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Oh my gosh, so many tips. Bring your own soap. Bring your own toiletries and towel. When you go into a shelter, you have to keep to yourself. I didn’t go in and act like I was above the shelter. I went in, hung out, and sat in a corner. Eventually, I was able to work my way in to be part of the group. I think that’s what’s so important – I had to humble myself. And the way I was able to connect with these guys was what was so great. Stereotypes are being shattered while some are being proven true. The bottom line … the whole way through here … is that you can’t take anything for granted. It doesn’t matter where you live – in a homeless shelter or on the Upper East Side – you can’t take anything for granted. That’s what this whole story is all about.

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That is awesome. What I learned from this, Adam, is that it pays to spend money on conditioner but not lunch because you ate Vienna sausages on crackers for lunch. So we learned a lot about you just in those choices!

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Even if you’re poor, you can be vain!

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We thank Adam so much for sharing his story with us. We highly recommend that you read his great book, Scratch Beginnings.

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Starting from Scratch – Part 1

Finding Your Passion One Week at a Time

According to Catalyst, an organization that studies women in the workplace, gender stereotypes still play a major role in how women are judged. If they act consistently with female stereotypes, their competence is questioned. But if their behavior is consistent with that of the stereotypical male, they’re viewed as being too tough.

Catalyst has done these studies all around the world. They’ve found that the characteristics of a good leader vary from region to region. But whatever is considered ideal, women fall short.

So it would seem that women can’t win.

We understand that you can’t change people’s perceptions. To be more direct, you can’t change bias that’s based on stereotypes. You can’t control anyone else.

So why worry about it? Focus on what you CAN control – how you conduct yourself and your business. You are the CEO of the most important organization in the world – YOU, Inc.

So today we’ll offer 3 tips to overcome stereotypes, gender-based or otherwise.

Tip #1 – Be yourself.
You can’t change opinions that can’t be changed. But if people like you, or at least respect you, you’ll succeed. So if you’re a nurturing person, nurture. If you’re assertive, be assertive.

Don’t try to please everybody. Don’t second guess who you are. Don’t try to become what someone else wants you to be. And don’t ever apologize for who you are.

Tip #2 – Promote yourself.
Make sure you’re getting the credit that you deserve. Don’t be so humble. Make sure you keep document what you’ve done. Make your boss aware of it. Then you’ll be in demand – with your current company or a new one.

Tip #3 – If all else fails, find a different workplace.
If your boss or your company isn’t supporting you, move on to a company that will. If you’re not completely ready, start making preparations. And that doesn’t have anything to do with preparation H! This isn’t an easy solution, but you have to go for what you want in life.

Tip #3B – Start your own business.
Create a workplace where you’d like to work. That’s the motivation for a lot of women starting a business. And women are starting businesses today at three times the rate of men.

Turning stereotypes upside down
Here’s something that we found very interesting – traits that are often viewed as negatives in the corporate world are being turned into advantages in the entrepreneurial world.

Margaret Heffernan wrote a great book, How She Does It: How Women Entrepreneurs Are Changing the Rules of Business. She says that female entrepreneurs emphasize values and relationships. They create a culture that includes employees, customers, and the community at large.

The result – they are building companies that last AND make a contribution. Doesn’t that sound like good leadership?

How have you beat stereotypes, gender or otherwise? Share it with us by leaving a Comment below!

Our bigg quote is by Anonymous.

Next time, we’ll sit down at the negotiating table for some delicious tips to negotiate your next deal. The women are having steak … the men are having quiche … how’s that for beating stereotypes?

Until then, here’s to your bigg success!