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Here we are – the holidays are over and we’re back to work. We’re ripe with enthusiasm as we consider the possibilities for the New Year. With that in mind, we want to talk about the single most destructive thought you can have.

Think of people you know who have one or more of the following traits:

• Need constant recognition.

• Often angry, or depressed.

• Complain about how unfair life is.

• Scared to take any risk, or sometimes even make a decision.

• Unsuccessful time after time, attempt after attempt, job after job.

• Unable to trust. They have few friends.

• They’re emotionally unhealthy, and that is even leading to physical ailments.

• Addicted to one or more of the following: alcohol, drugs, gambling, etc.

Why do people exhibit such behaviors? It’s often because of how they think. If you find yourself exhibiting one of these traits, you, too, may have fallen prey to the single most destructive thought you can have …

You think you’re not solely in control of your life.

Not accepting that you are in full control of your life is the easy way out. When life treats you badly, blame it on circumstances. Your parents. Your spouse. Your kids. Your boss. Anything or anyone, other than you! It’s much easier to blame outside forces than to accept responsibility yourself.

But some people look at this responsibility as a burden. It’s not a burden – it’s a blessing. It means you are free to create your dream life. It’s empowering!

Responsible means “response-able.”
You may be saying, “That all sounds great, but you’re kidding yourself if you think you can control everything.”

We’re NOT saying “you control everything.” We ARE saying you control your life. There is a difference.

Obviously, you can’t control everything that happens to you. But you can control how you respond. Steven Covey calls this “response-able” in his great book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

Thinking freed him from captivity
Victor Frankl, in his great book, Man’s Search for Meaning, tells his inspiring story as a prisoner in the concentration camps of World War II. He seemingly lost everything – his family, his friends, his clothes, his dignity. However, there was one thing nobody could take away from him … his thoughts.

Sometimes, he chose to escape his circumstances and envision himself far, far away. He chose to learn from his experiences – from the guards and fellow prisoners. He was free from the day-to-day brutality of the concentration camp because of his thoughts. Because of how he responded to his circumstances.

Our quote today is by author and speaker Roger Dawson.

“The most self-destructive thought that any person can have
 is thinking that he or she is not in total control of his or her life.
That’s when, ‘Why me?’ becomes a theme song.”

So you, and you alone, write the song that makes the whole world sing. Make your life a melody and enjoy inner harmony.

Next time, we’ll discuss why shy people make the best networkers. Until then, here’s to your bigg success!