Posts

BIGG Success Logo boxed

Are They Hearing What You Are Saying?

On the show, George recalled a teacher who made him write a report on what he wanted to be when he grew up. This was junior high; George didn’t know what he wanted to be. Maybe a major league baseball player?

So he did his report on being a bricklayer. His dad was a bricklayer, with his own business. When his teacher saw the title of his report, she said, “You mean with your brain, you’re going to be a bricklayer?”

George could have taken that comment as an insult about his dad. But his dad was good with his hands and his head. He said he did initially think that he wouldn’t get a good grade. But over time, her comment resonated with him. It helped him, as a young person, be more confident in his mental ability.

4 ways to get a message across
The statement and the delivery are both important parts of communicating a message. You can’t necessarily control what your message is, but you can control how you deliver it.

#1 – Negative statement, negative delivery
Without question, this is the worst way to communicate a message. If someone says something negative to you, in a negative way, they lose a lot. You’re not going to feel better. The relationship won’t be enhanced. You may get defensive or even angry.

"Speak when you are angry – and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.”
Dr. Laurence Peter


#2 – Negative statement, positive delivery

Sometimes the message isn’t positive, but we still need to get the message across. How you say it becomes incredibly important. A good example might be Donald Trump on The Apprentice. He’s said things like, “I love you; I think you’re a great guy, but you’re fired.”

Negative messages have to be delivered. However, you can choose to frame them in a positive way.

#3 – Positive statement, negative delivery
You risk diminishing the real message you’re trying to get across when you have negative overtures. George took away a positive from his teacher’s comment, but he could have just been insulted. 

#4 – Positive statement, positive delivery
Obviously, this is how you want to frame as much of your communication as you possibly can. This draws people to you.

How you respond to messages
You also can control how you respond to other people’s messages, no matter how they deliver it. Let’s take the worst one. Someone may hit you with a negative statement and deliver it in a negative way.

Pause before you respond. The conversation can go into a tailspin and be completely unproductive or you may be able to turn it around with the right response.

And we can be inspired, no matter what the message is or how it’s delivered. We have a friend who remembers being told that he was too small to make the high school football team. That “negative, negative” inspired him to go for it. Not only did he make the team, but he was a starter!

 

Related posts

694]

634] 

(Image by danzo08)

BIGG Success Logo boxed

25 Skills That Lead to Bigg Success

By Bigg Success Staff
05-13-08

Life Skills

twenty-five

In this article, we summarize five articles that discuss crucial skills for success. You’ll find the five key points from each article here along with the link so you can get any additional information you may want.

5 Things to Understand About Your Brain

#1 – Your brain is unique.

#2 – Your brain thrives on challenge and flow.

#3 – Your brain is a physical organ.

#4 – Your brain deals in emotions as well as thoughts.

#5 – You have multiple intelligences.

Ronald Gross is an expert in this area and and expands on these ideas in his book Peak Learning: How to Create Your Own Lifelong Education Program for Personal Enlightenment and Professional Success.

… and speaking of your brain …


5 Tips to Get Your Brain Thinking More Creatively

#1 – The George Costanza Method

#2 – Change your commute

#3 – Call things by the wrong name

#4 – Write with your other hand

#5 – Listen to a radio talk show that really ticks you off

David Wahl, of the Creative Creativity blog, wrote this great post. Get all his details about how to trick your brain into taking a fresh look at the world.

 

5 Suggestions to Get Things Done

#1 – Separate projects from tasks.

#2 – Learn the power of the verb.

#3 – Use technology to manage tasks and projects, but don’t get distracted by it.

#4 – Get your information at regularly scheduled times; don’t let it interrupt you.

#5 – Don’t seek out distractions to give your brain a “break”.

These suggestions come from Tiffany Monhollon over at the Red Suit blog. Read everything she had to say about moving beyond multi-tasking to actually get stuff done.


5 Ways to Keep Distracting People from Distracting You

#1 – Don’t have a place for them to sit.

#2 – Stand and come out from behind your desk.

#3 – Meet them at the door.

#4 – Provide an uncomfortable chair.

#5 – Take notes.

Mark Shead, of the Productivity 501 blog, offered these great suggestions. Get all the details about keeping distracting people from distracting you.


5 Ways to Make Yourself More Likeable

#1 – Be positive.

#2 – Control your insecurities.

#3 – Provide value.

#4 – Don’t be judgmental.

#5 – Become a person of conviction.

Justin Hartfield wrote this excellent article with five tips to increase your likeability.

(Image by woody1778a,CC 2.0)