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Beyond Networking

Today on The Bigg Success Show, we welcomed Melissa Giovagnoli. Melissa is an author, speaker, coach and entrepreneur. Of her 11 books, four have been on the best seller’s list and one was featured on The Oprah Winfrey Show. She is one of the world’s leading experts on networking and has appeared on The Today Show, CNN, CNBC, and Fox. She was recently named the “best networker in Chicago” by Crain’s.

Networking vs. Networlding

We asked Melissa for her best networking tip. She says not to think of it as networking, but think of it as networlding, which is the title of one of her books. Networlding expands opportunities rather than limiting them.

As a networker, you might set a goal of meeting two people. If you’re a networlder, you would set a goal of meeting two people who you can form a long-term relationship with and build opportunities for you, for them, and for the greater good.

The “overstuffed Rolodex syndrome”

Many people confuse activity with accomplishment. You leverage your network by thinking about who would be good connections for you. Start with people who have complementary values. With the online world, you can have quality and quantity by being specific about what you ask for to create a vibrant exchange.

7 levels of support

Networking isn’t about taking. It’s also not about just giving. You can support people:  

  • Emotionally
  • By providing information
  • By providing knowledge (information plus experiences)
  • By promoting them
  • Through wisdom sharing (the 20 percent that will yield 80 percent)
  • By creating transformational opportunities
  • Community (creating the greatest good for the greatest number)

Links to Melissa’s sites
This is Melissa’s most interactive community. The goal is for members to support each other in achieving their respective goals. You can create your own profile and build your own private circle around your special interest.

Networlding E-Learning
Here you’ll get six FREE lessons on networking for business and sales or networking for jobs.

Melissa will also help you with writing a book. If you’re really serious about it, contact her.


Related posts

Relationship Building Blocks

5 Laws of Stratospheric Success

3 Keys to Effective Networking

The Two Most Powerful Words You Can Use

The Other Pause that Refreshes 

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Are They Hearing What You Are Saying?

On the show, George recalled a teacher who made him write a report on what he wanted to be when he grew up. This was junior high; George didn’t know what he wanted to be. Maybe a major league baseball player?

So he did his report on being a bricklayer. His dad was a bricklayer, with his own business. When his teacher saw the title of his report, she said, “You mean with your brain, you’re going to be a bricklayer?”

George could have taken that comment as an insult about his dad. But his dad was good with his hands and his head. He said he did initially think that he wouldn’t get a good grade. But over time, her comment resonated with him. It helped him, as a young person, be more confident in his mental ability.

4 ways to get a message across
The statement and the delivery are both important parts of communicating a message. You can’t necessarily control what your message is, but you can control how you deliver it.

#1 – Negative statement, negative delivery
Without question, this is the worst way to communicate a message. If someone says something negative to you, in a negative way, they lose a lot. You’re not going to feel better. The relationship won’t be enhanced. You may get defensive or even angry.

"Speak when you are angry – and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.”
Dr. Laurence Peter

#2 – Negative statement, positive delivery

Sometimes the message isn’t positive, but we still need to get the message across. How you say it becomes incredibly important. A good example might be Donald Trump on The Apprentice. He’s said things like, “I love you; I think you’re a great guy, but you’re fired.”

Negative messages have to be delivered. However, you can choose to frame them in a positive way.

#3 – Positive statement, negative delivery
You risk diminishing the real message you’re trying to get across when you have negative overtures. George took away a positive from his teacher’s comment, but he could have just been insulted. 

#4 – Positive statement, positive delivery
Obviously, this is how you want to frame as much of your communication as you possibly can. This draws people to you.

How you respond to messages
You also can control how you respond to other people’s messages, no matter how they deliver it. Let’s take the worst one. Someone may hit you with a negative statement and deliver it in a negative way.

Pause before you respond. The conversation can go into a tailspin and be completely unproductive or you may be able to turn it around with the right response.

And we can be inspired, no matter what the message is or how it’s delivered. We have a friend who remembers being told that he was too small to make the high school football team. That “negative, negative” inspired him to go for it. Not only did he make the team, but he was a starter!


Related posts

How to Offer Criticism Without Being Critical

Are You Smart Enough to Say It Simply? 

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We Need Your Help!

Thank you so very, very much for taking time out of your day to look in, or listen in, on us. We can’t fully find the words to express how grateful we are that you give us a little bit of your most precious resource – your time. We promise that we will always try to give you something worthwhile in the five minutes or so you spend with us each day.

Why we started Bigg Success
We started Bigg Success to build a community of like-minded people. People who want to succeed bigg. Bigg goal-getters we call you. Fun-loving, positive thinking people who are usually happy, but never content. Looking to live your life your way and get to the next level of success.

We’re building a community that helps each other. We’re happy to volunteer our time to moderate – to be thought-starters – but we need your help. You see …

We don’t know you as well as we want to. And we don’t hear from you as much as we’d like to.

Now people in our business tell us that this is normal. But the Bigg Success community isn’t a group of normal people. It’s full of extraordinary people. Over-achievers. People who know they were born to do something bigg and are determined to do it.

People like you.

The most important thing we know.
We know a little about a lot of things and a lot about a few things. But here’s the most important thing we know …

All of us know more than any of us.

We also know that you’re a quiet group. We know you’re busy. That’s why we keep our content as short as possible while still delivering something to take away every day.

But here’s the thing …

We can’t make bigg success better without you. Without your participation.
We’re happy to bring you our content for free – we’re not asking for money. We’re asking you to give something more valuable – just a little bit more of your time.

Because bigg success can’t be a bigger success without you. Without your input. Without your wisdom. Because as the Chinese proverb says …

“A single conversation … with a wise person is worth a month's study of books”.

And you’re that wise person we want to have a conversation with!

So here’s how you can help …

Tell us how we can help you. Tell us what you want and need from us. Tell us the answers to these questions:

  • What do you like about Bigg Success?
  • What do you think we could improve upon?
  • What would you like to learn more about?
  • What would you like to see us do differently?
  • How can we help you get to the next level of success?

Here’s how to do it now …
Share your thoughts by leaving a comment. We know a lot of you have never left a comment anywhere before, but it’s as easy as typing up an e-mail once you’ve done it.

The easiest way to find our comment box is to click on the title of the article at the top of the page and then scroll down to the bottom where you’ll see “Leave a Reply”.

You’ll notice that a name and e-mail are required. You can just use your first name or even a fake name. You can use your real e-mail address or even a fake one.  Either way, your e-mail address is NOT made public. Nor do we use it in any way or share it with anybody. This requirement just protects us from those dreaded spammers.

… and in the future.
And then, keep sharing your comments on future posts …

  • Tell us you agree or disagree … we like to hear both. Just tell us why.
  • Tell us what we missed … you’ve had experiences we haven’t had. We want to learn from you too and so does the rest of the Bigg Success community.
  • If you don’t know something, or we didn’t make it clear … ask a question.
  • If you have an answer to someone else’s question … share it with all of us.

Everyone wins.
Let’s all learn from each other so we all reach our potential. There’s no scarcity of bigg success at Bigg Success. Everyone can benefit. Everyone can win.

And yes …

RSS subscribers, iTunes subscribers, and Zune subscribers …

… we work hard to deliver our content where you want it, but we’re talking to you, too! We want to hear from all of you!

Here’s what’s in it for you …
By getting involved in the conversation, we can choose future topics and design future posts that help you with what you need help with. Content that fits your wants and needs so you get to the next level of success in your life.

We thank you so much for reading, or listening, to this post. We look forward to getting to know you better. Until next time, here’s to your bigg success!



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May I have your attention please?  That’s what we’ll discuss today – how to grab attention.

It’s hard to do with so much competition for ears and eyeballs.

You have to make your message stand out. We saw a blog about a shining example of just this thing.

David Armano, an influential blogger, wrote a post about an e-mail from Darren Barefoot and Julie Szabo. They are the authors of the book, Getting to First Base: A Social Media Marketing Play Book.

Only it wasn’t just your typical e-mail. He not only noticed it … he stopped everything to blog about it! And here we are talking about it. So it worked, even better than they imagined!

So, you ask, what was so special about this e-mail?

Their e-mail was a digital photograph of a handwritten note. We’ll describe it here, but you can see the actual photo on David’s blog. The photo includes a pen in the upper right-hand corner, a decorative stamp in the lower right. It’s all placed on a visually pleasing background. The easy-to-read, cursive text is written with a silver paint marker.

It’s incredibly well-done. It looks like something you’d see on a postcard or a poster.

Let’s talk about what Darren & Julie did right.

#1 – They were original.
They didn’t send an e-mail OR a hand-written note. They sent a PICTURE of a handwritten note. How unique!

#2 – They spoke to David as a friend.
Their letter starts out “Dear David”. The next line compliments him and his site. The tone is friendly and personable.

#3 – They were polite in their request.
They didn’t assume anything. They asked him to check out their book, but didn’t presume that he would like it or even comment on it.

#4 – They provided a customized link.
This was their final special touch – they provided David with his very own special link to their book. How special would that make you feel? It also made it very easy for him to check them out.

They intrigued him, flattered him, and made it easy for him, but they made one mistake that could have blown it all.

They misspelled the word “you’re”. They spelled it “your”.

David said that it didn’t bother him because he was so impressed with everything else. However, to some people it could have been a deal-breaker.

So the lesson is – when you create your stand-out piece, make sure you proof it and proof it again. Get a second set of eyes on it, too!

Do you have an attention-grabbing secret that you’d like to share?
Leave us a Comment!

No one claims authorship of today’s bigg quote, but it’s still a good one.

“The principle mark of genius is not perfection, but originality.”

So don’t worry about coloring inside the lines, just color and make a splash.

Next time, we’ll discuss what we can learn from two country classics about getting in tune with your job! Can you say YEE-HAW?

Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

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TMI Is Not So Gr8

We’re not talking about TMI in the typical sense – someone reveals too much about themselves. We’re thinking about information overload.

Something we all know about. It takes skill to manage all this information. You don’t learn that skill in school. So here are some thoughts on how to manage it all.

Set limits
Establish times when you you’re available, or when you’re NOT. Some occupations require more accessibility than others. But everybody can set limits.

You don’t have to read every e-mail when it comes in! Set times to view it.

For example, you may check it first thing in the morning. Then again around lunch. Finally look it over near the end of your day.

Do what works for you, but don’t become a slave to your incoming messages.

Turn off your alerts, so you don’t see every incoming message. Use filters to automatically divert some types of messages – like those that are fun or personal – to another designated place.

If you’re like most people, it’s easier to resist temptation if you don’t see it.

Also spend a pre-determined amount of time reading and responding to e-mail. This will force you to write more efficiently. Short and to the point!

Now, let’s look at another “Inbox” – the one on your desk.

Set up three Inboxes – low, normal, and high priority, like you have with e-mail. Let the person placing something in your box establish the priority. You’ll see who the abusers are soon enough.

How about those pesky phone calls? You need to filter them, too.

Use voice mail as your virtual assistant. Then you can listen to all your messages at one time and respond accordingly.

Many people spend their time on what’s in front of them, instead of focusing on what’s most important.

Take some advice from Stephen Covey, as described in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Ask yourself two questions:

  • Is it important?
  • Is it urgent?

Obviously, if it’s important AND urgent, you have to react.

The more time you spend on important, but NOT urgent activities, the better. You’ll have fewer important AND urgent items on your agenda over time if you focus on these important, but NOT urgent things.

You’ll also have opportunities that are urgent, but NOT important.  It’s in front of you, and it may even be important to someone else. You know … they have an emergency. But it’s NOT important to you.

So here’s our question – aren’t you too important to deal with anything that’s not important?

Important people work on important things because
that’s how they will become even more important.

We’ve barely scratched the surface. We need more information!
Let us know how you cope with information overload. We can use the help!
Leave a comment.

Our Bigg Quote today is by Erma Bombeck.

“I have a theory about the human mind. A brain is a lot like a computer.
It will only take so many facts, and then it will go on overload and blow up.”

So don’t lock up – scan your system for fragments of information that you don’t need so you can run more smoothly and efficiently.

There’s a lot of talk about a coming recession. We’ll offer some tips on surviving, and thriving, a recession next time. Just in case!

Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

Related posts:

The Communication Debate: E-mail, Phone, or Face Time?

The Magical Word That Helps Balance Your Life 


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