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Why Your Boss Holds You Back – Part 1

getting held back by your boss | BIGG SuccessWe want to talk today to really good employees. If you’re truly not one – if you know you slack off, if you’re one of the average and ordinary – today’s conversation isn’t for you.

For all you BIGG goal-getters, we’re going to talk about something today that you may have already faced.

If you haven’t experienced it yet, you will. It’s only a matter of time.

Listen to this post! Click a player to hear George & Mary-Lynn on The BIGG Success Show Podcast. (Runtime 4:35)

You work hard. Much harder than most. You get there early. You stay late. You do your homework.

But it’s not just the time you put in.

You deliver results time after time. Your boss knows you’re his or her go-to guy or gal.

You get the hardest projects, the ones that are most critical to your organization’s success.

And you always come through.

Your boss notices. You get some credit for what you’ve done. You may even get a spiff or a small raise.

Out of the blue, an opportunity arises within your company.

You think you’re perfectly suited for it. It would mean a BIGG increase in responsibility but you’re confident that you can handle the challenge.

You also like the increased pay. But most importantly, this new position would place you on track for your ultimate goal with the company.

You’re so excited.

You can’t wait to talk to your boss. You know he or she could grease the wheels.

They could definitely get you an interview. Then it would just be up to you to demonstrate how qualified you are.

But when you tell your boss, you’re surprised at the reaction.

You’re given a laundry list of reasons why it would be a bad move.
You’re not qualified.
It’s not the right fit for you right now.
Be patient. A better opportunity will come up down the road.

You leave the office confused.
You can feel it.
This is a good move.
You are qualified.

A simple truth about your boss

You need to understand a simple truth about your boss:
Your boss wants to hold you back.

Not because you haven’t earned the opportunity to take on more.
Not because you’re not qualified.
No, none of these are the reasons your boss isn’t willing to help you out.

The secret motivation of your boss

The real reason? It’s the secret motivation of your boss:
He or she is being rewarded for keeping you where you’re at.

The rewards may be monetary. He or she is being paid handsomely and you’re the star performer lining their pockets.

They may get a lot of credit for the work you’re doing. You make your boss look good to his or her boss. Without you, the results just won’t be the same.

In other words, you’re too valuable to let go.

Seems like a good thing, right? But you may be so valuable that your boss can’t let you go anywhere.

You can’t really blame your boss. While it may be small-minded, it certainly is logical from his or her point-of-view.

What can you do about it? What are your options?

We’ll share three suggestions on our next show. Please check back tomorrow.

In the meantime, how about sharing with us? Have you ever had a boss who held you back? What did you do?

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What Won’t You Trade to Be a Success?

what won't you trade to be a BIGG SuccessBIGG success is life on your own terms. How cool is that? Your life, your terms.

But it isn’t a free lunch.

There’s a basic principle of negotiation – you get to set the price or the terms but not both. Unless you’re lucky enough to be negotiating with someone who doesn’t know better.

When it comes to life, most people choose to set the price. There are limits to what they will do to reach success at any level.

But you’re a BIGG goal-getter. So you set the terms, fully aware that BIGG success will set the price.

That’s why we talk about synergy – the BIGG idea behind BIGG success. You may not be able to have it all, but you can have more.

You can have more of what you want. You don’t have to accept conventional wisdom.

You can find ways to get areas of your life working together instead of at odds.

But there will still be trade-offs. BIGG success is about reaching your full potential.

It’s about feeling fulfilled when each day is done. And on this first Friday of a new year, we felt it was important to visit this subject of trade-offs.

What does life on your own terms mean to you? Think about it. Escape your current reality and dream BIGG.

Then bring yourself back to the real world. What are the trade-offs?

Sometimes we think we want something until we realize what it really means.

For example, how would you feel if you reached the heights of career success while your family felt neglected?

You are the entrepreneur of your life. You design and build the life of your dreams.

Make sure you clearly define what you really want, given the trade-offs, before you start designing and building.

Then you’ll create the life that fits you perfectly. That’s BIGG success!

What aren’t you willing to trade to be a BIGG success?

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Stick Your Next Out to Be a Success

thinking about four realities for BIGG SuccessBIGG goal-getters know that it’s wise to be happy, but not content. It means thinking about four realities.

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Your past reality

We almost didn’t include this one. The past is the past. Who cares, right?

But it is important to think about your past REALITY.

Our experiences are clouded. They’re clouded by our perceptions. They’re clouded by our emotions at the time. They are clouded by a number of things.

Make sure you’re seeing things as they truly were. Only then will you extract the right lessons.

Once you’ve done that, it’s time to move past the past.

In an ideal world, we could talk about the next two simultaneously. Since we can’t, we’ll keep it chronological.

Your current reality

It begins with an honest assessment of where you’re at. Are you happy now?

You can be.

You just have to know where you want to go. Then do all you can do today to move a little bit closer to it.

Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? And it is.

But life gets in the way. Obligations. Things-to-do. The unexpected.

Next thing you know, you haven’t taken a single step to the life of your dreams.

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Form a realistic opinion of where you’re at right now. What are you happy about? What don’t you like about your current reality?

Your future reality

We didn’t come up with this term. But we sure do like it. We like the certainty of it.

It’s not a wish. It’s not just a hope. It’s more than dream. It is what will be. And you will make it happen.

What does your future look like? Visualize it. Get a clear picture in your mind.

But don’t stop there. Use all your senses to experience it right now. Live it as if it were real.

Because it will be. It’s only a matter of time!

As you think about your future, be careful. You may make one of two mistakes:

  • Projecting the present into the future

This will keep you from reaching your full potential.

  • Escaping into the future

    You may project the unattainable. You have to believe it can be done if you stretch yourself quite a bit. That’s a good vision.

Now we’re ready for the fourth reality – and we may have you stumped. We’ve talked about the past, present, and future. What’s left?

Only the most important reality of all…

Your NEXT reality

What’s the next thing you need to do to move from your current reality to your future reality? That’s your next reality.

You’re a BIGG goal-getter. So you’ll focus all your time, energy, effort, and attention toward achieving your next reality.

Stick your next out! It leads to BIGG success!

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Startling Over to Be a Success

startling over in 2012 for BIGG SuccessIt’s a New Year! Time for a fresh start. A new beginning.

Only we have an idea. A startling one.

Most people think about starting over. We suggest startling over instead.

Startling over – surprising yourself and others with a fresh view to create positive change.

Here are five tips for startling over:

F the past

Do you want to really startle people? Then F the past.

Forgive them. But don’t stop there. Forget about it.

Give up any and all grudges. Holding on to them holds you back.

Leave the grudges to the losers. You’re a winner!

Oh, one more thing…

This goes for you too. Forgive yourself. God does. Why can’t you?

Learn from your past mistakes. Then forget about them.

Your future is calling. Get on to it.


Startle people – smile at them!

Smile at strangers on the street. Smile at the people in your life.

Smile at their mistakes. Smile at their quirks. Smile at their anger.

Smile. You’ll make people wonder what you’re up to!

Switch it up

Startle yourself and the people around you – switch it up! Do the unexpected.

Take a different route to work. Try someplace different for lunch.

Read a book instead of watching TV. Read fiction instead of non-fiction or vice versa.

Routines can easily become ruts. Ruts are for losers.

You’re a winner. So mix it up!

Random acts

Startle the people in your life with random acts of kindness.

Call a friend out of the blue. Tell them how much they mean to you.

Contact a mentor, a teacher, or someone else who has had a significant impact on your life. Let them know it.

Buy lunch for that co-worker you often eat with. Can’t afford it? Then buy them a cup of coffee instead.

Bring home a gift for your significant other, even though you haven’t been in a fight and it’s not a special occasion.

Do the opposite

Startle yourself and others by pulling a George Costanza – do the opposite.

This is a particularly useful observation if you’re not happy with some area of your life. In George’s case, it was every area!

Remember – if you continue to do what you’ve always done, the best you can expect is what you already have.

So don’t walk, run. Don’t sit, stand. Don’t think, do.

Do the opposite to shake things up!


Think of one startling thing you could accomplish by the end of this year. Not just anything – something that would really make you stretch.

It may be something you’ve wanted to do for a long time. It could be something that’s just hit your radar.

Go for it! Figure out what it will take to accomplish it.

Then give it your all. You’re a winner. Push yourself to prove to yourself that you can accomplish every thing you dream about. That’s BIGG success!

How will you startle yourself and others this year?

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Secrets for Making New Year Resolutions That Stick


making new year resolutions stick for BIGG SuccessAnother year is upon us.

Like any other new year, most people will begin the new year with anticipation and hope.

We toast one year good-bye, figuratively or literally, while we welcome the new one.

We let go of the past. We start fresh.

Most people don’t make New Year’s resolutions. Far, far fewer keep them.

Because of this, New Year’s resolutions have gotten a bad rap. They’re fodder for jokes.

The secret to making New Year resolutions

Resolution is another name for goal. You won’t reach BIGG success without clear goals.

That’s the secret to making New Year resolutions – they need to be clearly defined.

Want help setting your goals? Get our Goal Planning Workbook when you subscribe to our newsletter.

It’s a step-by-step guide to setting goals. And it’s free!

The secret to keeping New Year resolutions

On New Year’s Day, you’re confident in your ability to keep your resolutions.

You have the desire to get to the next level, to create a new you.

You believe you can do it.

So a secret to keeping New Year is to treat every day like New Year’s Day.

Bring the same optimism and enthusiasm for a better life into every day.

On some days, you’ll succeed. Give yourself a pat on the back.

Just remember, though, that tomorrow is the beginning of another year. You have to strive to keep your resolutions again.

There will also be days when you don’t keep your resolutions.

Don’t worry.
Don’t get discouraged.
Don’t beat yourself up.
Double your resolve.
Learn from it.
Double your resolve.
Let go of it.
Start fresh.
Tomorrow is the beginning of another year.

Change is difficult

Some setbacks are to be expected. People fail to keep their resolutions because they let these setbacks become excuses.

They didn’t keep their resolution today, so why keep it tomorrow?

BIGG goal-getters do the opposite. They realize that change is difficult. So they make every day New Year’s Day.

If you follow their lead, it will lead you to BIGG success next year!

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