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Why Women and Men Should Not Compete

gender_symbolPicture a group of adults given a task to perform. Research has shown that, if one adult performs worse than his or her peers on that task, it will result in a loss of self-esteem. Furthermore, that person is likely to perform more poorly on that same task in the future.

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Now put a group of four- to five-years old kids in the same situation. There is no affect on the child who didn’t perform as well as his or her peers.

So what do kids know that we adults have forgotten?
They think they can learn new tricks, they can adapt. We adults think that an old dog can’t be taught new tricks!

Kids also think they can try harder next time and make up the difference. Isn’t that a healthy attitude? So why don’t we think that as adults?

Have we been beat down too many times? Are we too hard on ourselves? Do we want to think that things should come easily for us?

Life will throw you curve bills. On the path to bigg success, there will be times when you try and you don’t succeed. It’s important to learn from your mistakes, but we often learn the wrong lesson.

Learn. Adapt. Then double your efforts.

Don’t compete with the opposite sex
A more recent study at the University of Michigan showed that kids can be affected by competition. Little girls respond negatively if a little boy does better on a task. Little boys respond likewise – there’s a damaging impact if a little girl does better.

So what can we conclude? Should we learn that women shouldn’t try to compete with men? Or that men shouldn’t try to compete with women?

See them as a role model, not competition
There will almost certainly always be somebody better. If not, maybe a good dose of humility is in order! But rather than comparing yourself to that person and getting discouraged, look at that person as a role model.

You are where you are. They are where you want to be. See what you can learn from them so you get to where they are.

Chances are they got started earlier. Chances are they’ve put more time in. Chances are they’ve gotten a few lucky breaks – the kind of luck that comes to people who put themselves out there and take calculated risks.

So don’t see them as competition; look at them as a role model.

Don’t compete with others at all

But there’s a higher order – a higher level of consciousness regarding comparisons. Here it is:

Don’t compete with anyone else – man, woman or beast!

Compete with yourself.

Find that thing you at which you excel. Then strive to improve a little bit every day – day after day, the “new you” competing against the “old you”.

Focus on making yourself the best competitor you could ever encounter! Have you ever noticed that a great competitor brings out the best in his or her opponents?

Become your own best competitor and you’ll be a bigg success!

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Thank you so much for the gift of your time today. Please join us next time when we’ll discuss the best investment you can make right now. Until then, here’s to your bigg success.

 

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file:
http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00524-112009.mp3

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Save Money by Sharing

sharing.jpgOur parents taught us to share. It was part of being a good little boy or girl. The economy is reminding us adults about the value of sharing.

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Home for Sharing

For example, some people are now sharing living space. More and more people are accepting the idea of having a roommate again by renting out a room to help pay bills.

There are a number of people who are out-of-work and looking to save money every way they can. “Necessity is the mother of invention” as we’ve heard.

Co-working

Another popular idea is sharing workspace. Freelancers across the country are creating co-working stations in their communities where they can share office facilities and other resources.

Instead of going it alone – signing a long-term lease, paying utility bills, buying office furnishings and equipment – they pay a fee and share space with other freelancers and entrepreneurs.

The spaces are usually nice and bright. They have a conference room and maybe even a full-time receptionist.

It’s not just about money. For freelancers who are starting to feel like loners, it gives them a chance for in-person human interaction during the day.

Sharing infrequently-used items

We started thinking about other ways to share. One example is a lawn mower. We only use our mowers once or twice a week. In our area of the world, we only use it for about half of the year. Would it make sense to share a mower with a neighbor?

As long as both people don’t feel the need to mow on the same day at the same time, it would probably work. There are issues – you have to both agree to take care of the mower and those sorts of things.

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georgeThis makes me think of my dad. If he owned something, he took really good care of it. If he used something that someone else owned, he took really, really, really good care of it!

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Sharing for fun

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marylynnI had an event coming up and I didn’t know when I would find time to go shopping. I told one of my girlfriends about it. She said that she had the perfect dress. We went over to her house and, sure enough, she did!

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georgeI needed a pressure washer to do some clean up around the house. I told one of my friends that I needed to go rent one. It turned out that he had one that he let me use for the weekend.

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Just so we don’t give the wrong impression, we also share our stuff with our friends!

A fun way to share

Since we like to do everything in a bigg way, let’s ramp up this idea of sharing more. Why not organize an event with a group of your closest friends?

Hop from house to house. If you want, you can have appetizers or organize a full meal as part of the activities. You can do it all in one day or create a series – this month at our house, next month at yours.

At each house, let the host show off the wares that he or she is willing to share.

It could be a Fashion Show – from clothes to accessories. Try them on if you want. Parade around. Show them off.

Or a Home Show … from power tools to hand tools. Test them out. Complete a project together. It’s your show; do what you want.

You could have a Home Entertainment Show. Show off DVDs, books and Wii accessories.

You can all see what each person in your group has to share. Then the next time you need that certain something, you won’t have to go out and buy it – you’ll know Joe or Jane has it.

This is a fun way to spend some time with your close friends. You’ll find that it will spark a lot of fun conversation and you’ll learn more about each other.

It’s also a creative way to save some money by pooling resources. That’s a bigg idea!

What have you shared with your friends?

Please share that with us by leaving a comment below, calling us at 877.988.BIGG or sending us an e-mail at bigginfo@biggsuccess.com.

We thank you so much for sharing some of your valuable time with us today!

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Recent research shows that, even before the recent decline in stocks and homes, the rich weren’t getting richer. Please join us next time when we discuss why.

Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

 

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file:
http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00380-042409.mp3

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Wealth is in the Eyes of the Beholder

santa-claus This is our twist on the old saying, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” Many people are enduring a rough holiday season. We may not be spending as much as we normally would. We see that as a bad thing. We don’t want to disappoint our kids.

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Sometimes we forget how much we already have. As we get older, we put expectations on ourselves and judge ourselves based on what we have and the gifts we can give.

The cardboard box

Have you ever seen a little kid get his or her first bigg toy – the one that comes in the bigg cardboard box? Have you ever seen a kid put the real toy aside and start playing with that cardboard box? They turn it into a fort and have fun with it for hours, playing with their friends. Through the eyes of us adults, that cardboard box is extraneous. Through the eyes of a kid, the cardboard box is a valuable toy itself.

We develop our point-of-view from our experiences. Obviously, we want to learn from them, but we need to be careful not to take away the wrong lessons. So this holiday season, try looking at the world through the eyes of a child again. Look at things as if you were seeing them for the first time. Be innocent again.

Through the eyes of a child

We want to share a touching story comparing how we perceive things as adults to how we might see them through the eyes of a child. A rich dad wants to show his daughter how less fortunate people live. So he took his daughter out to the country, where they spent a couple of days and nights on a farm with a family most people considered very poor. Here’s the conversation as they drove back to the city …

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dad
How was the trip?

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girl
It was great, Dad.

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dad
Did you see how poor people live?

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girl
Oh yeah.

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dad
So, tell me, what did you learn?

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girlI saw that we have one dog and they have four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to protect us; they have friends to protect them. We have a staff that serves us, but they serve others. Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are.

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As you might imagine, the girl’s father was speechless. He thought he would teach his daughter a lesson … it turns out that it was he who needed to learn one.

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Get the tips and tools you need to be a BIGG success
Subscribe to the Bigg Success Weekly – it’s FREE!

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We really appreciate you checking in on us today. Join us next time when we talk about the best present of all. Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

 

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file:
http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00291-122208.mp3

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Play at Work

play child’s play: something that’s easy to do.

We often don’t think about it, but play is actually child’s work. It’s all we had to do as kids and we learned essential skills by doing it.

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Then we grew up. Work becomes work. Play is what we do after all the work is done.

We see it as a trade-off. We work at our jobs. We get home and work on our chores. Maybe we’ll get some time to just have fun this weekend … or next … or when we take a vacation … but who has the time to do that these days? Oh well. That’s life.

It doesn’t have to be that way. We have a choice. We can integrate our work and play.

We can hear the objections already …

  • I need more play time. I don’t need to try to make work fun.
    Here’s where we need to learn a lesson from kids. If you can make your work feel like play, then you can play all the time.
  • No way. I can’t have fun at work. It’s just a job, not my dream job.
    We all have the power to choose. When we were kids, if we got tired or bored with whatever activity we were doing, we would do something else.
  • Times are tough. I’m happy just to have a job.
    This is a good point. As adults, we have responsibilities we didn’t have as kids. But just because we can’t change our situation instantly doesn’t mean we have to be stuck in it for the rest of our lives.

3 tips to make work seem like play

  • Love what you do
    We hear this all the time. You should do what you’re passionate about. We agree – it’s great if you can get paid to do what you love. That’s the ideal way to integrate work and play.

But we also think that passion is overrated. Instead, you may love why you do what you do. Perhaps your job gives you the income and the time away to pursue what you’re truly passionate about. You can still love your work because it’s the means to do what you really love.

  • Love who you work with
    Kids don’t play with kids they don’t like. Why should we? You may be in the right job in the right industry, but you’re in the wrong place. So change departments. Or companies. Granted you may not be able to make this happen overnight. But you can love what you do while you look for the right group to do it with.

  • Love the process
    This may be the main lesson we can learn from child’s play. They’re not worried about the result. They enjoy the process. In that process, they learn. They express their creativity. They socialize. They have fun. We put so much focus on the result that we forget the journey is the part that’s fun!

If you don’t love what you do, who you do it with, and the process of doing it, then how can you ever be happy? How will you grow? Where will you find meaning in your life?

If you do love what you do, who you do it with, and the process of doing it, then your work is your play. What could be better than playing all day? Better get back to it … another kid’s eyeing your toys!

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Get the tips and tools you need to be a BIGG success!
Subscribe to the Bigg Success Weekly – it’s FREE!

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We really appreciate you spending some time with us today. Join us next time when we’ll discuss mania in the markets and rising above the crowd. Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

Subscribe to The Bigg Success Show in iTunes. 

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file:
http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00270-112108.mp3

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Little Adults, Bigg Kids: What We're All Missing Out On

playground We recently read a great post by Dr. Robyn Silvermen about treating kids like little adults. She offers a lot of great links to research and other articles about this increasing trend.

 

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The calendars of kids today are as busy as ours. Between school and all their extracurricular activities, they’re too busy to really play.

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georgeI saw an interview with a little girl awhile back. She was brilliant, doing well in school and excelling at everything she did. Her one wish was that she could just have some time to play.

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Isn’t that sad?

Play pays

Don’t get us wrong – extracurricular activities are great, but it’s good to also have time to engage in activities that don’t have a goal with performance stress attached.

It’s good for kids to just play. It’s good for them physically, socially, and mentally. Play helps them develop their imagination and creativity as well as socially – all important skills in the years ahead.

Turning back the clock

Dr. Robyn cites a growing trend of kids having fitness club memberships. How many of us just love going to the gym? Do you remember playing … just good old fashioned play?  It was fun. Something you couldn’t wait to do. You got some great exercise, but you didn’t watch the clock like you do when you’re working out at the club. 

Speaking of clocks, the sad part is that we seem to be turning back the clock. Dr. Robyn’s article includes a quote that says kids are about two years behind in their development compared to sixty years ago. It seems we’re not evolving; we’re going backwards.

We need to do a 180

So let’s let the kids be kids. In fact, let’s take it a step further. Let’s do a 180 degree turn – instead of trying to turn kids into little adults, let’s become bigg kids.

Not in an immature way … just for fun and all the benefits that come with it.

We need to be more child-like. Do you remember being fascinated by bugs? Of course, we’re not talking about bugs inside the house. But isn’t it fascinating to just watch a praying mantis? How relaxing is it to see butterflies fluttering around?

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marylynnThat’s one of the reasons I love going for walks. I just love seeing all the cool plants. There’s a lake close to our house so I can watch the fish. It sure beats going to the fitness center and watching TV!

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We get so busy working that we don’t have a second to spare. Sometimes we even block people out so we can get all of our work done. That’s when play time is especially important. Play time is social time. You can relax and talk with people.

And you learn … things that you might not learn any other way. Because other people have different interests. By playing – socializing – you expand our interests. That helps you look at old problems in new ways. You find solutions that you may not find if you don’t get out of your routine.

Play expands our imaginations. Our imagination leads us to be more creative, more innovative. Which is how we find those bigg ideas that lead to bigg success!

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Get the tips and tools you need to be a BIGG success!
Subscribe to the Bigg Success Weekly – it’s FREE!

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Next time, we’ll take on Washington and Wall Street. Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

 

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