BIGG Success Logo boxed

Only One of These is a Key to Success

BIGG success is life on your own terms. So let’s talk about two terms that can be used to describe someone – assertive and asshole.

You may be way ahead of us on this one. We had never noticed it until recently. They both start with the same three letters.

Which raised several questions in our minds:
How similar are they?
Is it just a matter of degree?
Is there a fine line between the two?

The answer is a resounding no! These two terms are not part of a continuum; they are separate lines. They are diametrically opposed.

Let’s look at seven differences between being assertive and being an asshole.

  • An assertive person is a positive force. The asshole generates negative energy.
  • Someone who is assertive is confident in their own abilities. An asshole is often insecure.
  • The assertive person builds themselves up by also building up others. The asshole feels better about himself or herself when they tear other people down.
  • A person who is assertive seeks win/win. An asshole is perfectly content with win/lose.
  • An assertive person says, “No, thank you.” The asshole says, “Hell no.”
  • Assertive people are still buddies. Assholes are bullies.
  • The assertive person has no problem admitting when they’re wrong. The asshole will talk even louder, call you names, and fight even harder to convince you that you’re wrong.
  • Someone who is assertive operates from strength. Assholes work from a position of weakness.

It’s this last one that we found striking. When you look up the antonyms of assertive, you see terms like weak, wishy-washy, and mild.

Assertive people know where they want to go. They’re solid in their beliefs. People know where they stand. We all deal best with people when we know what to expect from them.

But it’s the last antonym that really struck a chord – mild. We’ll translate that as shy.

Assholes may not be shy, but a shy person may get labeled as an asshole! Shyness is often misinterpreted as another unfavorable term – stuck up.

So know what you stand for. Know where you want to go. And don’t be afraid to ask people for help. Only strong people behave this way. Assertiveness is a key to BIGG success!

Has assertiveness helped you?

Image in this post from stock.xchng

BIGG Success Logo boxed

3 Barriers to Success

3 Barriers to Your BIGG SuccessBIGG success is life on your own terms. You own your life.

It’s your enterprise. And you are the entrepreneur in charge.

So it’s up to you to take control to define, design, and develop the life of your dreams.

Listen to this post! Click a player to hear George & Mary-Lynn on The BIGG Success Show.

iPhone/iPad Podcast Player

[haiku url=”″ title=”The BIGG Success Show #753″]
Your definition of BIGG success

Our definition of BIGG success doesn’t make judgments.
It’s not up to us. It’s up to you.
It’s not up to others. It’s up to you.

However, it is BIGG success. And you’re a BIGG goal-getter. You won’t be content with ordinary success. You’re special. You’re a winner.

And you’re independent. You think for yourself. You don’t worry what others think or say. You’re going to do BIGG things.

You’ll show them. You will reach BIGG success. And when you do, you’ll be able to say that you’re a self-made man or woman.

It’s part of your definition of BIGG success. You have to make it on your own.

But you won’t. We know. You’re shocked to here us say that. But stick with us.

Losing advantage

Picture a person who is looking for a new job. The perfect opportunity presents itself. It’s the right job in the right career in the right company in the right industry. She knows an influential person at the company. But she doesn’t contact them. So she doesn’t get the job. She never even got an interview.

We’ve witnessed this type of situation a number of times. There are a variety of reasons why people lose advantage by a poor definition of BIGG success.

Today we’ll talk about three of them:

  • They lack assertiveness

    They don’t want to be a bother. They’re too shy. They worry too much about what other people think.

You have to get over it. People want to help you. It’s in our nature. But nobody can read your mind. So you have to let us know what’s on your mind so we can lend a hand.

  • They’re insecure

    They think asking for help will make them look weak. It doesn’t. When you ask for help, you show how strong you are. You’re confident enough to admit you need assistance from others.

  • They’re too proud

    We learn from the Bible that “pride comes before the fall.” We think it just applies to being too proud of your accomplishments and not showing the proper gratitude.

But sometimes the fall is imperceptible. You’ve fallen and you don’t even realize it. You fall short of reaching your full potential. Or you waste time and don’t reach it as fast as you could. So you don’t fully live up to your reason for being.

So don’t be afraid to reach out to others. Interdependence, not independence, leads to BIGG success!

Image in this post from stock.xchng

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file | podcast: