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5 Interview Questions for Barack Obama

soft_skillsHere in the United States, it’s convention time with the Democratic National Convention winding down tonight. It’s all about landing the biggest job in the world.

Whenever any of us goes for a job, it pays to think about our strengths. What makes us unique? What sets us apart?

Now when we think of the Democratic Party, we think of donkeys! Note we didn’t say jackasses … we don’t take sides here!

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It may seem strange to you, but we started thinking about what a donkey could say in an interview to stand apart. So we put a tie on our fictional donkey and sent him off for an interview. Although, we must admit, he still didn’t smell that good!

Our donkey emphasized that one of his most significant strengths was … his strength. In many parts of the world, a donkey is a person’s most prized possession. That’s because donkeys carry the burden so you don’t have to. Our donkey emphasized that hiring him would make your work easier.

Our donkey also stressed that he is a protector. In fact, donkeys are often used to scare predators away from farm animals. Predators like cougars (and we’re not talking about the Sex and the City kind). So our donkey asserted that if you hired him, he could keep competitors at bay!

Comedian Jake Novak, of Jake’s Comedy Corner, called in for today’s show. He’s thought about some common interview questions that might be good for the Presidential candidates. Today, he had some questions for Barack Obama. Next Thursday, we’ll share questions for John McCain. 

Jake’s Take – 5 Interview Questions for Barack Obama


Question #1: Where do you see yourself in five years?

Because in five years I’ll be living in Guatemala to avoid your tax hikes.

Question #2: Are you willing to travel for this job?
Because with a name like Barack Obama you’re going to get strip searched at the airport every time.

Question #3: Describe your employment history.

I understand you only need fifteen seconds to answer this, Mr. Obama, so try answering slowly.

Question #4: What can you do for us that other candidates can’t?
Besides inspiring us to diet because you’re crazy thin and we all look like blimps next to you, dude.

Question #5: What will you do when you get this position?
Because you’re not going to wake me up with another text message at 3 AM, are you?

Hillary Clinton was going to answer the phone at 3 AM. Barack Obama sends text messages at 3 AM. Guess we prefer a President who texts!

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Don’t Wait Until the Cougars Get Hungry

By Dana Mancuso
Bigg Success Contributor
05-28-08

Life Skills

cougar 

There were two cougars. Somehow they had killed a tiger and eaten it.

Never mind that this was in a hotel that I was staying in and that the scenery kept changing.
And never mind that I was walking past these two cougars on tip toes down the long stairs to the lobby to call 911 on my cell phone. In fact, ignore completely that this was a dream I had, because there is a point coming up that makes more sense than cougars eating a tiger or being in a hotel.

So in this dream, I called 911 and told the man who answered about the two cougars on the loose. That they had eaten a tiger and were just wandering free around the hotel – scaring guests nearly to death.

Long story short, I had to hide in a hotel tub (which was now outside) and put some type of board over my head to keep away from the cougars. While in the tub I called the folks at 911 again. When are you going to come get these cougars? At least send someone to stun them!

Okay, here comes the part that will later make my point. They asked me if the cougars had eaten anyone else.

NO, I told them. Well then, they didn’t think they needed to come get the cougars yet. The cougars had just eaten a tiger, so they should be full for a while. 

As often happens in dreams, this one ended without any resolution. But come on, this one needs some resolution. Someone has to come get the cougars before they get hungry, right? And someone should have recognized on the other end of the phone that even full cougars are dangerous.

As I thought more about the dream, this seemed like a classic procrastination story. Wait until later. No need to tackle this problem now. The cats are fat and sassy! But wait a minute; how long do cougars stay fat and sassy once they’ve eaten? Most things in life aren’t going to jump out and eat you if you don’t deal with them. But not keeping up can really take a bite out of your day or your ego.

This dream made me look at procrastination (which I am great at in some cases) a little differently. I had never looked at procrastination as something dangerous both now AND later, like the cougars.

  • It is dangerous now because putting something off robs me of my sense of accomplishment. It robs me of peace of mind. Even if I put it off now and “put it out of my mind”, I still know it has to get done. And so it nags at the subconscious.
  • Later it robs me of time because I have to rush to get it done.

Dreams can help you work out your “awake life”. This one was a step in the right direction for me. Instead of siding with the 911 voice, I strongly opposed putting off catching the cougars and wanted to take action now. Not a bad anti-procrastination statement! Maybe next time I can catch the cougars and conquer procrastination forever? I’ll tell you what I find out. Anyone have a stun gun I can borrow?

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