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Why Women and Men Should Not Compete

gender_symbolPicture a group of adults given a task to perform. Research has shown that, if one adult performs worse than his or her peers on that task, it will result in a loss of self-esteem. Furthermore, that person is likely to perform more poorly on that same task in the future.

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Now put a group of four- to five-years old kids in the same situation. There is no affect on the child who didn’t perform as well as his or her peers.

So what do kids know that we adults have forgotten?
They think they can learn new tricks, they can adapt. We adults think that an old dog can’t be taught new tricks!

Kids also think they can try harder next time and make up the difference. Isn’t that a healthy attitude? So why don’t we think that as adults?

Have we been beat down too many times? Are we too hard on ourselves? Do we want to think that things should come easily for us?

Life will throw you curve bills. On the path to bigg success, there will be times when you try and you don’t succeed. It’s important to learn from your mistakes, but we often learn the wrong lesson.

Learn. Adapt. Then double your efforts.

Don’t compete with the opposite sex
A more recent study at the University of Michigan showed that kids can be affected by competition. Little girls respond negatively if a little boy does better on a task. Little boys respond likewise – there’s a damaging impact if a little girl does better.

So what can we conclude? Should we learn that women shouldn’t try to compete with men? Or that men shouldn’t try to compete with women?

See them as a role model, not competition
There will almost certainly always be somebody better. If not, maybe a good dose of humility is in order! But rather than comparing yourself to that person and getting discouraged, look at that person as a role model.

You are where you are. They are where you want to be. See what you can learn from them so you get to where they are.

Chances are they got started earlier. Chances are they’ve put more time in. Chances are they’ve gotten a few lucky breaks – the kind of luck that comes to people who put themselves out there and take calculated risks.

So don’t see them as competition; look at them as a role model.

Don’t compete with others at all

But there’s a higher order – a higher level of consciousness regarding comparisons. Here it is:

Don’t compete with anyone else – man, woman or beast!

Compete with yourself.

Find that thing you at which you excel. Then strive to improve a little bit every day – day after day, the “new you” competing against the “old you”.

Focus on making yourself the best competitor you could ever encounter! Have you ever noticed that a great competitor brings out the best in his or her opponents?

Become your own best competitor and you’ll be a bigg success!

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(Image in today's post by personalfx)

Can You Walk And Chew Gum At The Same Time?

A study at UCLA asked participants to sort index cards with various shapes on them. The researchers divided the participants into two groups:

  • Group 1 sorted their cards with no distractions.
  • Group 2 sorted their cards while listening to, and counting beeps.

The researchers found that the two groups sorted equally well. However, the first group remembered what they sorted better than the second group.

So, something suffers when we multi-task. Doesn’t common sense tell us the same thing?

So why do we all try to do so many things at once?
There are many reasons – because we think we can, we get distracted, we’re bored, maybe we’re really just procrastinating, or perhaps we think it’s a competitive advantage.

The problem is … it’s not productive, because we want to be effective AND efficient.

Multi-tasking can be costly
Researchers at the University of Michigan found that, even with the simplest of tasks, it takes time to mentally switch from one to the other. It may only take a second for your brain to catch up, which doesn’t sound like much. But how many times do we do this in a day? And that’s for the simplest of tasks – more complex tasks can take up to a minute!

Not to mention that, multi-tasking requires us to FOCUS on concentrating rather than ACTUALLY concentrating. It also boosts stress hormones in our brain. So, in the short run, we get less done. In the long run, it’s bad for us.

So are these studies saying that we should NEVER multi-task?

You’ll be happy to know that you can walk and chew gum at the same time, because you’re performing two tasks that have become automatic. You don’t have to think about it anymore!

Many people may argue that checking their e-mail or text messages has become second nature.

But there’s a bigg difference – there’s a second human being in the equation. For the communication to be effective, you have to understand what they said, and what they left unsaid. Then, and only then, can you convey an effective return message.

In other words, you have to THINK!

3 tips to break the addiction

  • Admit that it’s a problem.
    If you don’t see it as a problem, you can’t solve it. This is the first step.
  • Out of sight, out of mind.
    Keep one thing in front of you. Everything else should be filed away. If you don’t see it, you won’t be tempted. Reward yourself with something you enjoy AFTER you complete each task.
Tell us what you think about multi-tasking!
Share your bigg challenges! Offer your bigg solutions!
Leave us a Comment below!

Our bigg quote today is actually a definition. No one claims it, perhaps for a reason ….

mul•ti-task•ing (mŭl'tē-tăs'kĭng, -tī-) n.
Screwing up everything simultaneously.

So make sure you stay focused so you only screw up one thing at a time!

Next time, we’ll share an ancient Chinese secret to solve all of your problems. You’ll be amazed at how simple it is! Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

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