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How Focus Leads to Failure

focus on this to be a BIGG SuccessYou need to focus if you want to be a BIGG success, right? Actually, it’s only partially true.

Listen to this post! Click a player to hear George & Mary-Lynn on The BIGG Success Show Podcast. (Duration 4:54)


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BIGG success comes to people who eliminate options. So narrow your vision down to what you really want. Then focus on those few things you need to do today to move you closer to that destination.

So far, so good. Unfortunately, that’s not how most of us work.

We get distracted. Ok, we can summon the willpower to stay on task.

There’s a bigger problem. It doesn’t affect everyone. But if you’re one of those people who experience it affect, you’re not alone.

A lot of people focus on the negative. We’re not just talking about “the glass is half empty” here.

We’re talking about people who can’t get past the past. Past failures weigh on them. And like an anchor to a ship, it keeps them firmly stuck in place.

If this sounds like you, break the cycle. And the key is focus. In our time today, we want to discuss five things you should focus on.

Focus on how

Losers focus on why. Why it won’t work. Why they (or you) shouldn’t even try. They can come up with all kinds of reasons.

And guess what? They’re right. It won’t work – for them.

While losers focus on why, winners focus on how – how to make it work.

They come up with a plan. They anticipate obstacles. They start. They learn. They adapt. And they succeed!

Focus on now

Losers focus on yesterday and tomorrow. What went wrong yesterday? What could go wrong tomorrow?

They don’t really learn anything from the past. They just remember the failures and the feelings associated with it. They assume tomorrow will be just like yesterday. And it will be!

Once they’ve extracted all valuable lessons from the past, winners forget it. They focus exclusively on the here and now. They focus only on the most important things today.

They operate under the assumption that the future will be better than the past. And it will be!

Focus on pow

Losers focus on their weaknesses and shortcomings. They beat themselves up – again and again – for these past failures. They use these failures against themselves as evidence.

It just proves it – they are not good enough, smart enough, educated enough, experienced enough, connected enough, etc.

Enough is enough!

Winners focus on pow. They focus on their strengths. They approach everything from a position of power. They know they pack a mighty punch.

Focus on vow

Losers focus on everything. They make promises to themselves and to others. But because they’re trying to be all things to all people, they usually fall short.

Winners are careful not to over-commit themselves. They make vows. Then they focus all their energy on fulfilling it before making another vow.

Focus on wow

Losers focus on doing the minimum. They only worry about meeting expectations.

Winners focus on the wow. They want to exceed expectations – on the vows they’ve made to others and more importantly, the vows they make to themselves.

So they push themselves further every day. They often surprise even themselves!

The irony of focus

When it comes to focus, you have a choice to make. You can choose to focus on what you don’t want.

Think about it. Talk about it. And you know what? You’ll get it.

Focus can lead to failure.

But if you focus on what you do want, you’ll get that instead. You get what you focus on. Focus can lead to BIGG success!

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file | podcast:
http://traffic.libsyn.com/biggsuccess/00817-070512.mp3

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The Number One Reason You Are Not Getting Ahead

getting ahead in life for BIGG SuccessBIGG success is life on your own terms. The number one reason people don’t get ahead can be stated in just one term:

Choices.

Choose something

Many people are frozen by fear. So they do nothing. They don’t see this as a choice, but it is.

It’s a choice to remain average and ordinary. It’s a choice for the status quo. It’s a choice to remain stuck.

If you want to get ahead, do what the winners do: Choose to do something – even if it’s wrong!

When you try something, you learn. You now have a competitive advantage over the person who chose to do nothing.

Choose to live now

Okay, so you got out of your comfort zone. You tried something. Things didn’t turn out the way you hoped they would.

It’s at this point that many people make another harmful choice. They choose to demean themselves for the choice that didn’t work out.

For some people, there’s a ritual revolving around experiences like this. They feel bad. They feel like they failed. They start to beat themselves up – and not just for this one choice, but for almost every choice they ever made.

It’s a death spiral. It kills the spirit.

Winners know that outcomes won’t always equal expectations. So they choose to not worry about coming up short. They choose to tweak what they’re doing or to try something else.

They choose to live now, rather than in the past. They choose to only invest additional energy on things they can control, not things they can’t.

They choose to persevere, even if that means starting from scratch. And ultimately, it leads to BIGG success!

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Why Talented People Often Fail to Be a Success

what it takes to be a winner | BIGG SuccessWith the Super Bowl coming up this weekend, we’re thinking about winners and losers.

We talked with a two-time Super Bowl champ, Howard Griffith, on the show a while back. You can hear what it takes to be a winner straight from the source!

Listen to this post! Click a player to hear George & Mary-Lynn on The BIGG Success Show Podcast. (Runtime 5:05)


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Today, we want to talk about an interesting phenomenon – the most talented people often fail to be a success. Let alone a BIGG success!

We’ve all seen them.
They seem destined to succeed.
They look the part.
They have people who believe in them.
People who say they are the next BIGG thing.

But success never comes.
Why do they fail to be a success?
How can you increase your odds of being a BIGG success?

You have to have to will the win.
Almost everyone thinks they have it.
But let’s dive into this a little further.

Do you have a hunger for BIGG success that can’t be satiated?
It’s a force inside you.
It constantly drives you.
It presses you to boldly go to places you’ve never gone before.
It pushes you out on a ledge without a safety net.
Then you’re a winner!

Are you consumed by this desire to succeed in a BIGG way?
You think about it all day, every day – from the minute you wake up because you have to get going, to the time you can’t get to sleep because there’s still so much you want to accomplish.
Then you’re a winner!

Do you have to do it, do you just have to be a BIGG success?
You cannot accept not winning.
You cannot accept some modicum of success.
You need BIGG success!
You need to stand out in the crowd.
You need to get through the noise.
You need to win BIGG!
Nothing less is acceptable.

How do you know if you have this winner’s mindset? Ask yourself two questions.

How do you handle adversity?

When things don’t go your way, when you appear to be losing, what do you do?

Because you have a choice to make.

  • Option 1: Beat yourself up

    Start a dialog inside your head, or even out loud, about what you don’t know, who you don’t know.

    Tell yourself you’re not good enough, you don’t have what it takes to be a success.

    Watch the conversation quickly spiral downward. Look at people you know who have succeeded. Get jealous. Tell yourself how easy they have it.

    People like them; they don’t like you.

    And then just give up. Stop trying. Quit. This is one way you could go. It’s the loser’s way.

  • Option 2: Double down

    But you’re a winner! So when you run into an obstacle, you will double down. You will reach deep within yourself to find a reserve of strength you didn’t even know you had.

    You will use this strength to get back up. You will huddle up with key people in your life. You will talk to your coach to see how to adapt.

    Then you will run another play. You will keep pushing for the end zone. Play after play, you’ll seek to find your best self. You’ll give everything you have to compete for the BIGG win.

The 2nd question to ask to know if you have the winner’s mind is the second side of the coin.

How do you handle success?

When momentum swings your way, what do you do?

Again you have a choice to make.

  • Option 1: Playing not to lose

    You can start playing to not lose. This isn’t a conscious decision; it’s a sub-conscious reaction.

    You start playing it safe. You stop making the aggressive plays it took to get momentum on your side.

    You let fear drive you.

    “Oh-my-gosh, I’m doing it! I’m winning! Wow! I had hoped for this, but I wasn’t really expecting it.”

    And guess what happens?

    Before you know it, you’ve lost the momentum you worked so hard to gain. It’s even harder to get back. You end up losing the game.

  • Push even harder

    But you’re a winner! When success comes your way, you will push even harder.

    You have the eye of the tiger, that killer instinct.

    You will keep playing aggressively because you know you will win. It’s only a matter a time before you win the game. That’s BIGG success!

If you were inspired by today’s show, please share it with your friends and followers.

Thanks so much! Until next time, here’s to your BIGG success!

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file | podcast:
http://traffic.libsyn.com/biggsuccess/00778-020212.mp3

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Blame, Blame Go Away

never_give_up Gordon Brown, the British Prime Minister, recently showed his sense of humor before a meeting of the Council on Foreign Relations. He said that one of his predecessors gave him three envelopes when he took the office. He was to open the first when things got bad, the second when the situation got even worse, and the third if they ever got critical.

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So a while back, he opened the first one. It said, “Blame your predecessor.” Obviously Tony Blair wasn’t the person who gave him these envelopes!

Before long, the situation worsened. So he opened the second envelope. It said, “Blame the statistics.”

Recently, as things continued to get worse, he finally succumbed and opened the third one. It said, “Start writing three envelopes to your successor.”

Fortunately, he was joking. But it raises a serious point – the way in which a lot of people respond in crisis. First, fix the blame. If that doesn’t work, run!

Bigg winners respond differently.

Bigg winners say blame, blame go away. They focus on fixing the problem, not the blame. So much energy is spent trying to find out who’s responsible. Leaders focus on what the problem is. Fix that. Then worry about who should be held accountable.

Also, when faced with a serious problem, bigg winners don’t worry about what happened yesterday. We get so focused on who did what to whom. Today is what matters. What are you doing today … right now … to find a solution to your problem? That solution lies in the present, not the past.

But finding a solution is just the beginning. Don’t stop there. You have to act to make your solution work – the sooner the better. But be prepared … you may not have found the right solution yet. That’s okay. Test your solution. See what happens. If it doesn’t work, test another one.

Which brings us to perhaps the most important thing bigg winners do when faced with a problem – they don’t ever give up. As long as you’re still trying, you’re not a failure. Press on! See that wall that lies before you? Climb over it, dig under it, go around it, or plow right through it!

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We really appreciate that you took time out of your busy day to spend a few minutes with us. Join us next time when we discuss how to be a career renegade. Until then, here’s to your bigg success!

 

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file:
http://media.libsyn.com/media/biggsuccess/00318-012809.mp3

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Do You Play to Win?

By Bigg Success Staff
09-7-08

Peak Performance

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Sporting events are a great microcosm of the games we all play. So we can take some great lessons away from them. One of those lessons is playing to win. Now you may be thinking … that seems kind of silly. Doesn’t everybody play to win?

The answer is a resounding “No”!

You see it with teams that aren’t “supposed” to win. They’re the underdogs. But they get the lead. They may be as surprised as everybody else.

And that’s when it happens …

They stop playing to win. They start playing to “not lose”.

Is there a difference?

The answer to that question is a bigg “Yes”!

Just like great teams, we need to play to win if we’re going to win bigg. Here are some key traits to adopt:

People who play to win have winning as their goal.

This may sound crazy to you also. But is it? Many people start out with a goal of winning. But as they inch closer and closer to the success they desired, their goal changes. They’re doing better than they ever imagined. So they get nervous. Their goal shifts to “not losing”.

It’s not a conscious thing. But you can see it in their actions, in their faces, and in their demeanor. And it’s ironic – the more they try not to lose, the more likely they are to lose. 

People who play to win put themselves on the edge.

You’ll never succeed bigg if you don’t take some risks. But what if you’re winning the game? Some people stop taking the risks that brought them so far. They become too risk-averse, thinking that playing it conservative will help them preserve their lead.

Now, it’s true that taking a risk doesn’t always pay off. By definition. But never taking a risk will never pay off. You have to put yourself out there. You have to be willing to make mistakes. Learn from them. Recover from them. And keep playing to win!

People who play to win are confident they will win.

Some people think they can win. Winners know they will win! Even when things aren’t going their way, they’re not troubled. They keep playing the game they came to play.

Sure, they’ll make some adjustments. They may change up their offense – or their defense – or both. But they keep on pushing. There is no doubt they’re going to win. It’s just a matter of time!

People who play to win get in “the zone”.

People who win don’t think; they do. They do what they’ve prepared to do. Because they’re thoroughly prepared, their body, mind, and spirit all reach a state of flow.

They go through the motions, but they aren’t just going through the motions. These motions flow up from deep within them because they’ve mastered their game.

Meanwhile, the people who are playing to “not lose” are busy thinking. Their self-talk isn’t the same as the people playing to win. They’re worrying about mistakes. They’re punishing themselves every time something doesn’t go their way. They’re over-thinking and over-reacting.

So how does the game usually end?

People who play to win … win.

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Strategies for Becoming More Confident

By Bigg Success Staff
09-11-08

Life Skills

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The difference between those who are successful and those who succeed bigg is confidence. Elite athletes and those who are peak performers in their career have high self-confidence.

Here are some of the techniques they use to be at the top of their game:

Practice Consistently

The only way to be ready to "step up" is to put in the work. When the game is on the line, the Yankees are always happy to see Derek Jeter at the plate. When the pressure is on, Derek shines. Experience, along with countless hours of practice, allows us to master our craft and perform confidently.

Disregard Doubt

If we focus on what we can do, rather than what we cannot do, we can overcome self-doubt. Where is the benefit of worrying about the unknown? Winners push down feelings of doubt, by focusing what they know they can do to finish the task at hand.

Try Harder

If we label a defeat as a "failure", we are telling ourselves we lack ability and count ourselves out. Confident people never admit to defeat or feel defeated. They just try harder to achieve their goal next time. They look for ways to improve their effort through preparation, concentration, skill execution, or other factors.

Play to Win

When we play not to lose, our focus is negative and reactive. When we play to win, we aren't afraid to take chances and take control.

Manage Emotions

When we face adversity without confidence, we tend to get angry, upset, depressed, or pessimistic. When things don't go our way and we are confident, we don't get emotional, we don't give up, and we find a way to overcome the situation.

Success Breeds Confidence

Bring more success your way, by recalling your past successes. Remember your accomplishments and that feeling of success. Remind yourself that you can do it!

Find Success

Confident people recognize their accomplishments on a consistent basis. They set small achievable goals along with bigg ones. They structure success into their daily lives by setting and accomplishing meaningful, attainable goals.

Success Networks

Confident people reach out for help to get to where they want to be. If you want to learn how to do something, find someone who is successfully doing it and learn from them.

Success Talk

Confident people say the words "I can" and "I will".  Their self talk is never doubting and negative, but rather instructional and motivational.

Look Successful

Act confident to feel confident, even if things aren't going your way. Confident people always stand up straight, walk with a bounce in their step, and keep a smile on their face. Acting confident helps you feel confident which makes you look confident. 

*Improve your self-confidence by identifying your abilities and positive attributes. Complete the Finding Your Self-Confidence worksheet.

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