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bad critique-BIGG Success

How to Handle a Bad Critique

bad critique-BIGG Success

A bad critique can put a BIGG Goal-Getters into a bad mood fast. We are perfectionists at heart. We strive to do our best every day and put thought and heart into the work that we do. It’s personal for us. It’s a reflection of our work ethic.

What’s worse than being told we’ve done something wrong – is being told about it with destructive criticism rather than constructive criticism.

Listen to us share today’s tips on The BIGG Success Show Podcast, and get a bonus tip that’s not here on the blog. Click PLAY.

The Bad Critique

BIGG Goal-Getters agonize over having to critique someone. They write it out, practice saying it out loud, and try not to be too negative while getting a point across. So it stings quite a bit when you aren’t treated in the same manor.

We’ve all experienced the boss who just rips you a new one, or who makes one mistake seem like that’s the scope of your entire work history. It’s easy to feel defeated, and even worry that your standing in the company just got knocked down a few rungs.

The Best Way to React to a Bad Critique

You can’t let a bad critique keep you down. Here are some things you can do in response.

• Don’t respond when you’re upset! You’ll only say things you’ll regret. You’ve never burned bridges so don’t start now.

• If you believe the criticism is wrong, carefully and calmly debate why you think it is.

• Resist the urge to over please your critic. Fix the issue, let the appropriate person know, and move on.

• Don’t let your critic’s voice get into your head. It’ll just make you nervous and more likely to make another mistake.

• Try not to take it personally. You are you. Your work is your work. There is a separation.

• Consider the source. Not everyone cares as much as you to handle things the right way. Realize your critic has a lot to learn.

• Talk to someone you trust. Get out your frustration and say the things to them you’d never say in a professional setting.

Unfortunately, there are people who are put in leadership positions that have no idea how to be a true leader. You can’t control how this person will behave towards you in the future, so focus on what you can control…your reaction. It leads to BIGG Success! How about you? What suggestions do you have to offer about reacting to a bad critique? Leave a comment below.

Direct link to The Bigg Success Show audio file | podcast:
http://traffic.libsyn.com/biggsuccess/00892-022614.mp3

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Are They Hearing What You Are Saying?

On the show, George recalled a teacher who made him write a report on what he wanted to be when he grew up. This was junior high; George didn’t know what he wanted to be. Maybe a major league baseball player?

So he did his report on being a bricklayer. His dad was a bricklayer, with his own business. When his teacher saw the title of his report, she said, “You mean with your brain, you’re going to be a bricklayer?”

George could have taken that comment as an insult about his dad. But his dad was good with his hands and his head. He said he did initially think that he wouldn’t get a good grade. But over time, her comment resonated with him. It helped him, as a young person, be more confident in his mental ability.

4 ways to get a message across
The statement and the delivery are both important parts of communicating a message. You can’t necessarily control what your message is, but you can control how you deliver it.

#1 – Negative statement, negative delivery
Without question, this is the worst way to communicate a message. If someone says something negative to you, in a negative way, they lose a lot. You’re not going to feel better. The relationship won’t be enhanced. You may get defensive or even angry.

"Speak when you are angry – and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.”
Dr. Laurence Peter


#2 – Negative statement, positive delivery

Sometimes the message isn’t positive, but we still need to get the message across. How you say it becomes incredibly important. A good example might be Donald Trump on The Apprentice. He’s said things like, “I love you; I think you’re a great guy, but you’re fired.”

Negative messages have to be delivered. However, you can choose to frame them in a positive way.

#3 – Positive statement, negative delivery
You risk diminishing the real message you’re trying to get across when you have negative overtures. George took away a positive from his teacher’s comment, but he could have just been insulted. 

#4 – Positive statement, positive delivery
Obviously, this is how you want to frame as much of your communication as you possibly can. This draws people to you.

How you respond to messages
You also can control how you respond to other people’s messages, no matter how they deliver it. Let’s take the worst one. Someone may hit you with a negative statement and deliver it in a negative way.

Pause before you respond. The conversation can go into a tailspin and be completely unproductive or you may be able to turn it around with the right response.

And we can be inspired, no matter what the message is or how it’s delivered. We have a friend who remembers being told that he was too small to make the high school football team. That “negative, negative” inspired him to go for it. Not only did he make the team, but he was a starter!

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Related posts

How to Offer Criticism Without Being Critical

Are You Smart Enough to Say It Simply? 

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